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Family Dynamics

Embracing the varied aspirations and needs of multiple generations—the elders, the parents, the risers, the future—requires patience, wisdom, and courage.

Family Family Dynamics

OnCourse International supports, guides, and facilitates many different families. There is no “standard” approach for addressing family dynamics: “If you’ve worked with one family … you’ve worked with one family.” Families are as diverse as the individuals that comprise them. All have their unique histories, complexities, opportunities, and challenges.

Leaders / elders in dynamic, loving, and successful families often feel a “calling” to promote, preserve and deepen authenticity and collaboration across generations.  By exploring and codifying the values and mission to which the family aspires, a foundational family governance structure can emerge that opens the door for new opportunities … strengthening familial bonds, creating ongoing support systems, and ensuring continuity and legacy. A thoughtful, intentional structure can assist in addressing family-related concerns around financial management, philanthropy, education, family events, and grooming of the rising generation.

Many families also suffer from ongoing soap opera-like sagas, cast often as a sad and comical mix of victims, villains, and heroes. The critical first step in altering this pattern and restoring authenticity within the family is for one committed family member to step out of the drama and into a place of responsible maturity. This person—often the patriarch or matriarch, but sometimes a son or daughter—can serve as our gateway into the family system. We first support this family leader in finding and maintaining a grounded presence, and then guide other willing family members into and through the direct conversations they have avoided with one another for years, decades, or even lifetimes.

When each family member takes 100% responsibility for family harmony, the family dynamic has the potential to shift from energy draining to authentic and enduring.

Common Family Situations

  • Most family members are reasonably aware and mature. The family elders (parents, patriarch, matriarch) wish to collaborate on a next-generation family plan.
  • Unclear roles, agreements, estate plans, or leadership succession are draining energy in a family business.
  • A next-generation child in a family business seeks more responsibility, but the parents or other family members don’t feel the child is ready.
  • Squabbling or warring exists among adult siblings, and the parents or other siblings aren’t sure how to mediate.
  • A family member desires a career outside of the family business, but feels pressure to join or stay in the business.
  • An adult child is struggling, lost, or estranged from the rest of the family.
  • An adult child has been raised with a sense of entitlement, and the parents don’t know how to break the pattern.
  • The next generation is ready to assume the reins of a family business, and the prior generation is unwilling to give up control.
  • The family dynamic is dysfunctional. One or more family members are torn on whether to work in and through the dysfunction, or exit the dynamic and take care of themselves.

Family Dynamics Offerings

We collaborate with family leadership in these areas:

  • Hosting a launching meeting with key family members to create a framework of respect and protocols for go-forward interactions
  • Getting consensus on values, mission, and engagement rules within family leadership
  • Beginning to collaborate on a viable governance structure and next steps
  • Launching and managing a family office
  • Designing and overseeing a memorable family gathering
  • Drafting an enduring family constitution
  • Forming a family council
  • Accelerating the education and maturation of the Rising Generation to realize their own destiny
  • Addressing and resolving challenges, tensions, or disconnects within the family
  • Connecting families with a network of world-class family specialists (estate planning, wealth management, tax planning, legal, philanthropy)
  • Navigating rites of passage with courage and grace (empty nest, marriage, divorce, passing of loved ones)

 

Contact Us

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Loy Teik Ngan and Chong Kweikee

Loy Teik Ngan and Chong Kweikee

Our next-generation family forum has given our three daughters and three young adult relatives the awareness, clarity and maturity to strengthen their sense of self and explore their unique giftedness. They have grown to be confident, centered young adults.

YPO / Malaysia
Rami Malhas

Rami Malhas

The “Empowering the Rising Generation” workshop is direct, real, raw … and transformational. Jim and Paul “held the space” masterfully as facilitators, guides, and coaches. As a result, Ramzi and I now have the tools and intention to navigate our differences and respect each other’s passions with encouragement and love.

YPO / Emirates Chapter
Wayne and Lisa Cooper

Wayne and Lisa Cooper

The “Empowering” program brought us close as a family and our early-20's children gained new insights for navigating early adulthood. Both young adults and parents, we urge you to attend this program. You will gain incredible value in just a few hours.

YPO Gold / Fairchester

FAMILY CORE VALUES

Vibrant families have enduring core values. Here are some examples.

  • Stewardship over the family’s financial, intellectual, human, and social capital
  • Explore vulnerable or emotional topics together (money, beliefs, power, relationships, death)
  • Address and resolve interpersonal issues and conflicts quickly and maturely
  • Empower each person to use the full suite of his or her natural and developed talents
  • Develop a spirit of spontaneity, playfulness, celebration, and gratitude
  • Welcome diversity in ideas, beliefs, and relationships
  • Exhibit care and compassion—with accountability
  • Express love to one another
  • Receive love from one another
  • Honor family history and traditions

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OnCourse International, LLC
Boulder, Colorado – USA
+1 303 817 8100

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OnCourse International is a team of seasoned professionals who inspire and guide leaders and their families as they navigate business transitions, plan and enact personal transformations, and commit to authentic relationships.

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